Getting Down to the Bottom...of the Chicxulub Crater
- Matthew Joaquin
Scientists are attempting to get into nitty-gritty of the cause of the deaths and frankly, the tragic extermination of one of earth’s most beloved and treasured creatures. We’ve all wanted one before, and if you’re lucky, your ancestors (grandma, great grandma, grandpa, maybe mom/dad depending on how old you are) owned one or two. Yes, we’re talking about dinosaurs.
Scientists are looking to drill into the Chicxulub crater, the spot where that giant-asssssteroid command-control-reset-ed the world and denied us our true destiny: riding and owning a tyrannosaurus rex. Or, if you’re a more complacent and demure beta, you can ride a triceratops or one of those long necked freaks.
What if presidency was decided by dueling whilst atop two T-rexes? That right was stolen from us, and these great explorers of science are working to help us understand why.